This word comes up a lot — especially in mission statements which are used as a way of communicating the purpose of the organization. Yet, somehow it seems more emphasis is placed on the moral implications rather than on congruency.
My challenge to you is to keep things simple. When we focus on the morals of what is right and what is wrong, then it becomes a conversation of who is right and who is wrong. Focus first on being true to your word. In other words, make your word your bond, while at the same time, being congruent with your words. True, do this when that bond is with others and even more importantly do it for when you make a bond with yourself.
Do this completely and three things will happen:
- No one will need to figure out your morals. It will not be a battle of who has it right, or who has it wrong. You have permission to be who you are and reap the rewards or suffer the consequences as others for at last know who you really are.
- You will separate yourself from the majority of the pack that are left changing their rules seemingly with the wind. Sure, you can still change your mind but with integrity used this way you will do it based on new information and the choices will usually set new courses of direction rather than making exceptions.
- Your peer group will slowly change around you. Separating yourself from the majority — assuming you use your powers for good — will attract others that value the same goals you do and help make the world a better place.
Unlike organized religion, that seems to push morals upon others, having integrity requires no cooperation to be complete. In terms from the #AskGaryVee show referenced above it is about playing the marathon and not the sprint. To influence the outcome you need to become the outcome. Get it right, inspired others will join you. Do this not by holding a sign, or attempting to instill your rules upon others, but rather by holding a congruent course that is easy for others to see and follow if they choose. For it also seems to be part of human nature that when one attempts to control the actions of others it is really a reflection of something broken within.
While this story was still in draft I listened to the Tim Ferriss interview with Kevin Costner and thought about how his story related to integrity. Specifically, Kevin recounted the decision to go to his first audition at time when the concept of becoming an actor was still something completely foreign to him. He was in his senior year of college and somehow connected to casting call for a Rumpelstiltskin play in the school newspaper. To make the longer story short on the way to the audition the accelerator in his old pickup truck broke and went to the floor at a time when there was stopped traffic in front of him. Yes, here he was accelerating rather than breaking with a hard wall of stopped traffic, and probable death, not far in front of him. Somehow he thought fast enough to push the clutch in and turn the engine off, coast to the side of the road in the emergency lane, and…
What would most people do at this moment after returning to safety?
For Kevin the answer was to hop over the fence, leave the dead car there without a worry, and hitchhike to that audition. An audition, which in the end, he did not get the part, yet still started his passion for an industry he nothing about. Some may call this determination, which is true to some degree. It is, however, the alignment between action and thought, and the consistency of thoughts, which is the foundation of integrity. Have this kind of integrity for yourself first, and then when working with others, will change around you.
When I articulated that I didn’t care anymore what anybody thought about what I did, except for me, all the weight of the world came off my shoulders and everything became possible. — Kevin Costner
(Originally posted on Medium)